In a recent Facebook post I wrote about a long-term relationship I have had with someone that has been very frustrating, challenging and sad. It has felt stuck for a long time and although I can see its wonderful potential, the other person cannot. Then, while thinking about it a few nights ago, I understood why it has never moved forward, isn’t ‘working’, and is so disappointing and painful. This realization was so powerful that I was able to release the relationship and all of its challenges and frustrations in just a few minutes. The post received so many comments and shares that I knew I had to share more of this information with you.
What I realized, that I had never seen before, was that our relationship existed in different dimensions. I am remembering a connection with him that doesn’t exist for him because he is not at that level in this lifetime (and may never choose to be there). My purpose in his life has been to help him remember something he doesn’t want to remember now. And I am holding an energetic space for him that he is not ready or willing to occupy with me.
The dimension, vibration and frequency he has chosen to experience his life at today are part of his lessons. I hold a different frequency that is available to him but he has to choose it; I can’t choose for him. Now I can see the potential that we could have as a couple and it is amazing, but not only does he not see it, the thought of being at that level scares him away. While I think I’m giving him the most amazing opportunity, he thinks I’m trying to push him into a situation that he doesn’t want to be part of (and he really doesn’t).
But this kind of situation exists in my life beyond this relationship, it is also present in many other areas of my life in which I remember a far more joyful and powerful connection with others and hold energetic space for them to join me there but they cannot see it and are often angry or frustrated with me, instead of sharing my vision. I had to realize that this is not their path in this lifetime, unless they choose it. And so far, they are not there even though I have worked very hard to allow that to happen, including martyring myself on their behalf.
Here are some of the ways you can know that you are in a multi-dimensional relationship (and consider these points in every relationship, not just the romantic ones):
1. You feel you are working harder at making this work than the other person.
2. You wish they would change.
3. They are your ‘blind spot’ and you can’t see their faults even though everyone else in your life wonders why you are so attached to this person or can’t see what they see in them.
4. You have a very strong connection but the relationship feels stuck.
5. You are afraid that the relationship will not work out and have a nagging feeling that it will end one day.
6. They secretly or openly think you’re odd, strange, different or hard to understand.
7. You can see more potential in them than they can see in and for themselves.
8. You can see more potential and possibility in the relationship than they can see or acknowledge. And you may feel like you are being deliberately rejected.
9. If you are honest with yourself, you know that you are a martyr in this relationship.
10. The relationship ends suddenly and painfully and you do not understand why.
This isn’t anyone’s fault, it is one of the by-products of our spiritual growth now and as we approach higher dimensions, we are not all doing it at the same rate or in the same way. We have also connected with many of our soul mates and partners to remind them of other aspects, possibilities and potentials for their lives. In this way we present them with a reminder of a soul contract and a different choice that they can make. But if they have not yet completed the learning on the path they’re currently on, they are not ready to evolve into a higher dimension. We know what is possible for us together but we can’t share it with them until they are ready to know and see it for themselves. And that may never happen in this lifetime.
In these relationships, it may feel like we’re being rejected (and we are, in a way) but it is the invitation to join us at a higher dimension, vibration or frequency that is being rejected. What can you do? Nothing, except to honor their path, release them and you, and move on to attract someone who is aligned with the dimension, frequency and vibration you are at. This is also why many of our biological family relationships are ending and we’re finding new connections with people we are not related to, that are far more loving, joyful and fulfilling. These are long-standing soul contracts that are coming up for us and the rejection is painful, at a soul level, because we are honoring a commitment to them, made eons ago, and feel like they are breaking their commitment to us. But that is their path and it’s their journey of healing that they have to choose for themselves.
For many people, this lifetime is one of great learning and although they came to be powerful, they seem to be choosing the expression of their power through some very low energies. But this is what they need to experience and although we remember our connections with them at an entirely different level and hold that space for them, that is not where they choose to be now. Accepting this will give you peace, release and closure and within a short time, you can disconnect those cords to release yourself from that soul contract, the healing path, remove this obligation from your energy, and free everyone to be in your respective dimensions and find joy there.
Copyright (c) 2013 by Jennifer Hoffman. all rights reserved. You may translate, quote, or link to this article as long as you include the author’s name and a working link back to this website. All other uses are strictly prohibited.
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